Wednesday, February 03, 2010
I'm not on your side this time, Mum. @ 23:15
So this was what happened: you went back home after having been outside for hours. With your brother, all sleepy and exhausted. You got off the ride and took your spare key in your pocket while emphasizingly--yet jokingly--saying to him that you really don't want to see certain person which fucked you up to no end earlier in the morning beneath the door if you open it. When you actually then saw that unwanted person at the first place as the door gaped open, welcoming you loathingly, making your smile faded; what would you think?
"You forgave him again, didn't you. You embraced his fake remorse, you accepted him, and you hoped we can do the same as you. Since HOW, do tell, am I supposed to trust and forgive and care of a person who tortured me since I was a kid both physically and verbally? Who doesn't even want to pay for my educational life and caused my lecture postponement and instead have been cursing at me to not heading into a University and spending the money I needed all alone?"
Specifically, Mum, to be honest. I'd rather not having a place to come back to than have to see my own father living in the same roof and walls of bricks with me.